Monday, September 1, 2008

Just Your Standard ER Visit

ERP has a good post up about some of the crap we have to deal with, so I couldn't resist posting a comment, and then I went to such work writing the comment, that I thought I should at least get some credit for it, so I'm reposting it here for your pleasure:


When I read your rant about obesity, it reminded me that I haven't had breakfast yet, so I jumped in the car to run over to Burger King. It was hot, so I had the top down, but the wind brought back my migraines, so the voices in my head told me to get care right away. I would have gone to my doctor but I'm in the process of suing him because he wont treat my pain. Anyway, I pulled out my cell phone and told the ER that I was coming over and they should get me straight back because the pain was so bad. The doctor was a total jerk and wouldn't even believe me when I told him that my sister had accidentally taken my prescription in her suitcase when she went on her month-long vacation. Then he tried to prescribe Ultram! I'm allergic to Ultram! I told him that, but he wasn't even listening. The only thing that works for me is that Dilatim or whatever it is called. And I couldn't believe that everyone out at the nurses' station was laughing. They were probably laughing at me. Don't they realize that there are really sick people in the ER? They need to learn to be more serious. Anyway, what really takes the cake is that they wouldn't let me plug in my adaptor for my Game Boy Advance, and the battery was low, so I just had to sit there for 3 hours. That's right! THREE HOURS! And when he finally did come with a prescription, it seemed like he was being disrespectful of my severe anxiety, because he just turned the light on, mumbled something about a patient next door who couldn't breathe or something, and gave me the prescription and said I should see a doctor. What, he isn't a doctor? I told him that I couldn't afford this medication, and he had the guts to suggest that I cut my smoking down to only 1 pack per day to free up some money. I can't believe how insensitive some people can be. Maybe I'll find a lawyer.

7 comments:

ERP said...

My God, you have suffered beyond what any mortal human could possibly bare.

crazyrn2be said...

Oh dear God Braden...you are a hoot! I laughed when I read that "so true somewhere" blog! You's a funny little man!

keepbreathing said...

My god, I've heard this almost word for word from people. Dead on!

bluebanana said...

Hahaha I died when I read this on just keep breathing's note. So accurate, its amazing.

Mika said...

Too Funny but too true. What a great blog.
~m

StorytellERdoc said...

That is way way way too funny. Did you write this? Very talented if you did. I laughed out loud. God Bless the Ultram allergy!

exit2213 said...

I think I've taaken care of you before. The only thing you forgot is that your pain and anxiety was sooooo bad that you had to go outside to smoke every five minutes and the nurses kept yelling at you for it. Don't they understand your PAIN????