Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Broken Ankle Sprain

This sounds more like a CYA diagnosis.  Just wait until the x-ray results come back and cross off the first or the last word.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Back pain and Leg

As it turned out, not only did she have a Leg, but, in fact, she had two.  Needless to say, I rushed her right back.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Remove Stin

She actually meant, "Remove Stitches".  At least I think that's what she meant, because that's what I did.  Hopefully I wont get a lawsuit across my desk in the next few days asking me why this lovely young lady is still walking around with all of her Stin still in place, and where, perchance, I may have placed her precious stitches.

Here's to keeping my fingers crossed.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

MVA IN Room 24 w/wife

I suppose if you are going to have a car accident, having it while already in the ER is pretty good because you are assured prompt care.  I'm just not sure how you got your car into room 24 to begin with... and we may have a hard time getting the ambulance in there.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Busted ear drumb

Dear patient,

You made a spelling mistake.  The last word has one letter too many, but you'll have to try to figure out if you should remove the b or the r.

Sincerely,

Me

Today's "Reason For Your Visit" - Body Parts Edition #1

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason(s) For Your Visit:

Right index finger
Left shoulder
Neck
Heart
Right Rib Cage
Shoulder
Ankle

And this is just a handful.  I understand that when you want to get seen, you don't want to spend a lot of time writing a novel, but perhaps you could at least specify what is wrong with said body parts.  Are they missing?  Infected?  Cut?  Broken?  Hurting?  Ugly?  Overweight?  Mildly gangrenous?  Is gangrenous even a word?  Does it really matter, after all, it is my blog and I can do whatever I want?  Should I have put a question mark at the end of that last question?  Does anyone care?

Sorry, got distracted.  Anyway, I particularly love the visit from the Tin Man thrown randomly in the middle of that list.  I suppose he probably went to his PCP, but found that he couldn't get in for several days, and since Dorothy was already coming to the ER to have her bunions looked at, he may as well see if we could finally and conclusively end his search.  Lion was going to come for moral support, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it, and I think scarecrow was found wandering aimlessly around in the diagnostic imaging department.  Let's just hope that the Wicked Witch of the West (please visit www.www.com) doesn't find out about the no-drinks-at-the-nurses'-station rule, because so far that is the only thing keeping her at bay.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Pain

I suppose this is like me showing up at McDonalds and being asked what I want and responding, "food".  I'll take "could you be more specific" for 1000 please, Alex.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's get to today's Reason For Your Visit:

Heart Pains

You may think that you know who this patient is, but I assure you, it really wasn't Anne Murray.

Today's "Reason For Your Visit"

When a patient checks in at our ER, they are asked to fill out a half-sheet of paper with name, phone, SSN, birth date, and "reason for your visit".

Whenever I work triage, I write down the interesting ones and have been building up a list.  Some are funny, some embarrassing, and some just tickle my warped sense of humor.  I try to give the benefit of the doubt.  I know that these people are hurting and just want to be seen, but it still makes me shake my head to see some of the things that patients can come up with.

Thus, my regular (as in whenever I feel like it) series, "Reason For Your Visit."  Please keep in mind that spelling, punctuation, and capitalization are copied directly from the original paper.

So let's start off with today's Reason For Your Visit:

sick

That's right - this patient wanted me to be aware of the extent of her problems, so she took great pains to delineate each and every complaint in painstaking detail.  Sure, it may just look like four letters to you, but to an experienced triage nurse it is so much more.  To a triage nurse in a busy ER, these four letters are explicit permission to skip over this patient and take care of the one with right lower quadrant pain.  She may complain, but I have four letters that might help explain the Reason For Your Delay:

busy